The Quiet, Forgotten Quality

Talent without loyalty drives division. Creativity without loyalty follows the same path. In fact, fill in the blank with your favorite personal trait, leave out loyalty, and you will find a joyless, self-fulfilled life.

Loyalty is arguably the most over-looked and evasive quality in our culture today. It is rarely emphasized in an evaluation or analyzed in an interview. It is rarely the quality that is noted when talking about a person’s success in life. When is the last business book written about loyalty?

A guy named Benaiah is a model, a picture of radical loyalty in the Bible.

Benaiah is a protagonist in the book “In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day,” by Mark Batterson. A challenging, inspiring book with the title taken from the following Bible verse.

Benaiah son of Jehoiada, a valiant fighter from Kabzeel, performed great exploits. He struck down Moab’s two mightiest warriors. He also went down into a pit on a snowy day and killed a lion. 1 Chronicles 11:22

As Batterson and the Bible explain, Benaiah was a warrior. The guy followed a lion into a pit and the lion didn’t come out! He was one of the “thirty mighty men” that served as King David’s bodyguard. Although some of David’s followers defected, attempting to take the throne, Benaiah was loyal until the King’s death. He was a servant. And, after David’s death, we find Benaiah exactly where we would imagine, serving his son Solomon. Many words could be used to describe Benaiah, fearless, warrior, servant, but the foundation of all of his amazing feats is loyalty. In fact, Benaiah’s name is synonymous with loyalty.

Loyalty is a quiet, yet magnetic characteristic, and is arguably the most powerful trait of an individual. Loyalty drives unity among people. But, if we look around, loyalty is extremely hard to find. Examine different areas of life, and we see quite the opposite. As examples, I point to five areas where loyalty is extremely evasive.

• God – Perpetual loyalty to God is difficult, virtually impossible. Peruse the Bible and, even the strongest in faith, struggled. Abraham, David, Moses, Peter, and, even, Solomon, the wisest one on earth. Although he walked with the Lord, he also offered sacrifices to other gods (little g). Solomon showed his love for the Lord by walking according to the instructions given him by his father David, except that he offered sacrifices and burned incense on the high places. (1 Kings 3:3). Let your loyalty to God be renewed each morning.

• Marriage – No need to look at the national stats, just look around at your family and friends. In the beginning, marriage vows stand on the foundation of loyalty. “Till death do us part” is a phrase of extreme loyalty. Everything else grows from this foundation. I recently told a couple celebrating their anniversary to “finish strong.” The wife rightly replied, “I hope not too soon” to which I replied “fair enough.” But, I think the phrase “finish strong” in a marriage starts on day 2. On day 2, the world starts pulling at the strings of loyalty in a marriage. Jeff Bezos famously uses “day 1” as a reference to urge his Amazon employees to tackle each day as if it was the first day in business, match the zeal and passion. I believe the “day 1” rally cry can be used in a marriage. “Finish strong” begins day 2, referring to the zeal you had on day 1.

• Friends – Friendships needs loyalty. Loyalty among friends overlooks faults. “Come as you are” rightly describes deep friendships. It seems that we have been taught the way to a better life is through another person, at any cost. The topic of many a conversation is other people. We naturally seem to break down friendships with our tongues. At Adrian Roger’s funeral, one of his kids said that he never allowed gossip about others in their homes. She explained that while the rest of the world may have been eating others for lunch at the dinner table, this was never in their home. I wonder how many of us could say the same thing at our dinner table? How many could say this about our friendships? The issues of others are often magnified, while our personal blind spots remain hidden. The foundation of friendship is loyalty. Be a great friend.

• College Football – Sorry, it is almost football season. The transfer portal in college football was implemented over the last couple of years. Rather than having to sit out a year before playing for a new team, a college player under scholarship can transfer from one school to another and begin playing immediately. There is no penalty or limit. Approaching this season, 1,500+ players have been through the portal. 1,500+ students not happy, packing their bags, because the grass is greener at the new school. Mike Leach, head football coach of Mississippi State, recently said that the portal robs young kids of learning to persevere, get through tough times. When things are not going their way, they transfer, free of charge.

• Occupations – In a ‘Fast Company’-Harris Poll, 59% of middle-income workers said they’re thinking about changing jobs. This stat mirrors all of the examples mentioned above. My dad worked for the same company 50+ years. Things have changed. The loyalty train in organizations has left the building. Maybe this points to lack of loyalty at levels in an organization. Be a loyal leader. Be loyal followers. Loyal followers make loyal leaders.

No doubt, loyalty is a hard to find characteristic in the world today. If you find it, treasure it, thank God for it, and meet loyalty with loyalty. This could be the greatest treasure you will ever discover on this earth.

One parting thought on loyalty. When the world and others have let you down, there is a stream of perpetual loyalty. There is none more loyal than God. His words are true. His promises always come to fruition. He promises to be with us always and forever (Matthew 28:20). I am compelled to meet His loyalty with my loyalty. And, although I will fail, He is grace, his loyalty to me will not fail.

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