The Mask

Everyone has a mask, how one wants to be perceived in society. Our ego feeds one to maintain the mask, dress up our identity, to make sure we are the head of the class or at least not an outlier in the normalcy of life. But, the mask carries a weight. The further ones moves from reality, the heavier the weight.

Any of these examples jump out at you? These examples all hurt to some extent, as I have worn each in my journey. I am willing to bet that you will agree.

• Wealth
  • If the mask is one of wealth, the person’s public perception causes them to live in bigger houses, nicer neighborhoods, drive nicer cars, wear the finest clothes, take the vacations, and, all the while, make sure the public is aware. This mask gets heavier and heavier over time.
• Popularity
  • The popularity mask has many different dangers, and the younger one is, the stronger the pull to put on this mask. This desired perception leads one to file in, to do whatever is needed to look like we are “winning” in life or cool, depending on your age. Maybe the perception of having many friends or attending many functions drives the person.
• Health
  • This mask moves one to put themselves on a health pedestal, a place where others need to keep up to maintain pace. Extreme focus on diet or exercise or activity creates a gap versus the general public, a place of perceived victory. Get on the bandwagon is the message.
• Religious
  • Possibly the most dangerous mask in society. When your public persona is “religious” or “spiritual,” you have it together. One has a perceived shield of peace. The religious one has this enlightened persona, a deep connection to God that must be maintained in the public eye. The religious mask leads to a life of works based spirituality, the idea that the more I do, the closer I am to God.
• Perfection
  • This mask causes one to lead a perceived flawless life, the perfect marriage, the perfect family, perfect children, you get the idea. The public persona is one that chooses the correct path, makes the right decision, nails “it,” whatever “it” is, every time. The mask feeds a sense of well being from looking down on the frailties of the lives of others.
• Success
  • One protects this identify at all costs, as this mask carries power and influence. With a title or an occupation, comes the idea that one is “winning” or has won the game of life. The corporate ladder or the prestigious occupation equals victory.

Many other masks exist in society, but the point is that we all wear one. We all desire to be perceived a certain way. The truth is that behind the masks, not one of us lives up to the the public persona.

Last week, I was part of a discussion with six couples. For 45 minutes, we took off the mask. We moved away from the lives each of us led on social media and were real with each other. The journeys that led us to that moment. The different paths and struggles we each had. The baggage that everyone was carrying around. The struggles we faced in marriage, with kids, in life. We arrived to the discussion thinking that we were all mountains apart, and we left the discussion knowing that we were all the same. None of us had it together. None of us had this cookie cutter life posted on social media. For about an hour, the mask was removed, the weight was gone, and we shared each others victories, defeats, and struggles.

I read articles about the high percentages of people that are lonely or the epidemic of mental illness that is rampant in society, and I can’t help but wonder if masks aren’t at least partially to blame. Since everyone wears a mask, a social media persona, there is a perceived gap between the public perception of a life and a life that one sees when they are alone, looking in the mirror. This gap can drive anyone to a dark place. The greatest harm of a mask may be the damage it does to others.

The removal of the mask is the beauty of the cross.

Every single person that has ever approached Jesus has removed the mask and come face-to-face with a Holy God. With Christ, there is no mask. In Christ, there is no condemnation for past mistakes or current failures. It is wiped away, covered by the cross. In Christ, there is no desire to keep up with others, to magnify oneself, to create a public persona. The desire is overtaken by the grace given from the one that died on the cross. And, in Christ, their is no weight, no burden to carry. The battle is over.

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.  Matthew 11:28-30

The mask, the weight, can be removed at the foot of the cross, the place where we are all equal.

Remove the mask today, you need it, others need it, and you will find rest. And, the removal of the mask will inspire others to do the same.

Impact others. Live generously.

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